Thanks for putting this into words Angie. It really resonates with me. It is sad that when i am feeling joy, pretty soon after there are thoughts of the what if's of the future. And there is almost always some underlying anxiety. I know there have been so many people in this space before now and they lived through it. But I'm sad that I don't see myself getting to be that person with that "optimism varnishing" power, at least I don't see it in my future now. Unless i just cut myself off from reality which just ain't happening. But we do have each other and those unvarnished times will at least be shared with those we trust and love!! Wishing you guys a peaceful and restful holiday and rest of the year! ❤
Thanks for sharing where you're at with it all, Kim. I don't want anyone to feel this way, but I think we all do & you're right . . . it helps to share these unvarnished times we people we trust & love.
This has definitely been one of my hardest seasons of life. I can't in good conscience say it is THE hardest because I went through a medically terminated pregnancy. So that was by far my saddest, lowest time. But this time has been emotionally exhausting. I have been stuck in the tunnel, still having to function for my family. I keep hoping to get through to the other side of the emotional exhaustion tunnel but I can't even see the opening yet. We have been dealing with behavior problems, being out numbered with 3 children, loud triggering noises from the children, (whether fighting or playing, it all seems to trigger me), years of trying to heal a 4 year olds constipation issues, trying to start my own business, which fulfills me and is my passion, but having to put it to the side each time another sickness (and there have been too many to count this fall) or change in sitter schedule pops up, financial stress and credit card debt, and day to day responsibilities. I can't stop but I want to. So I'll just keep trucking and know that things look better in the mornings. I will try to take your advice and hold capacity for what is important and lose the things that drain me. Happy holidays and cheers to a fresh new year!
Courtney, I really like that you clarified that this is one of the hardest seasons of life, but not THE hardest. I think I've also had some periods that were on a very personal level much harder (single mom w/ infant on welfare, for instance), but I think that "stuck in the tunnel" thing you referenced is a universal, or almost universal, feeling right now. I know, like Kim said above, that there have been other points like this in history & people somehow made it to the other side or through the tunnel, but this is a pretty dramatically low point that we're all experiencing vs. our personal lowest points.
I'm so sorry to hear all those things weighing on you & esp. want to acknowledge the "want to stop, but can't" aspect of it. I sending you even the tiniest extra capacity for joy.
Looking forward to hearing from you after your long restful break. We all need that. Thanks for all the inspiration and wise words in 2022. You always nail it. Love and light x
We are definitely on one accord here. I was interviewed last week and they asked what my plans were for the rest of the year. Without skipping a beat, I replied, "To end softly. I have been going strong for the last few years and it is time to go soft. I will start strong again in January."
Everything in nature rests. We are no different. Rest without fear dear friend. Fear is work so rest without it. I will be here when you get back, as I am sure others will be too.
You just made me tear up. Thanks for the reassurance. And yes, we aren't a part of nature, we ARE nature. Rest matters for us too. I hope you have the deepest rest over the holiday too. Hugs.
This resonated big time. Add in the loss of my mother the day after Christmas 2021 and then 7 days later on Jan 2, Covid took my father. It’s been a really rough few years. I need a break too. Im going to join you, and hopefully come back feeling a little better. ❤️
Oh, Amanda, I am so very sorry to read that. That is an incredibly painful loss so close together. I'm so glad you're going to join me in taking a break & I hope it helps refill your tank, even just the smallest bit.
Thank you, it was quite a shock. I’ve avoided social media breaks because, well, then I’d have to face the facts. Your message spoke to me and I feel the time is right. Grateful for you, and this neighborhood. 😘
It's been more three years since I've slept through the night. I'm trying to find my way back, hacking and trudging through dense underbrush back to peace, rest, hope. Back to myself.
May you, and all of us, enjoy peace on your break, Angie. We'll be here when you get back: we're all too exhausted to go anywhere in just a few weeks!
That quote from Sara Ahmed really sits with me. I feel that on so many different levels. Thank you for putting this into words. And for acknowledging the railway workers! I'll see you in 2023, friend.
Yes, Melanie, I haven't stopped thinking about it since I saw it this summer. And you're welcome on the railway workers . . . I have a lot of respect for that type of work. I used to work in trucking and import/export. I helped coordinate a lot of freight moving from our ports on to trains. They work non-stop & deserve all they demand & then some.
Ah, yes! I really hope everyone who reads this feels they've been given permission, if it will help us make a collective shift. Thanks for being here!
Thanks for putting this into words Angie. It really resonates with me. It is sad that when i am feeling joy, pretty soon after there are thoughts of the what if's of the future. And there is almost always some underlying anxiety. I know there have been so many people in this space before now and they lived through it. But I'm sad that I don't see myself getting to be that person with that "optimism varnishing" power, at least I don't see it in my future now. Unless i just cut myself off from reality which just ain't happening. But we do have each other and those unvarnished times will at least be shared with those we trust and love!! Wishing you guys a peaceful and restful holiday and rest of the year! ❤
Thanks for sharing where you're at with it all, Kim. I don't want anyone to feel this way, but I think we all do & you're right . . . it helps to share these unvarnished times we people we trust & love.
This has definitely been one of my hardest seasons of life. I can't in good conscience say it is THE hardest because I went through a medically terminated pregnancy. So that was by far my saddest, lowest time. But this time has been emotionally exhausting. I have been stuck in the tunnel, still having to function for my family. I keep hoping to get through to the other side of the emotional exhaustion tunnel but I can't even see the opening yet. We have been dealing with behavior problems, being out numbered with 3 children, loud triggering noises from the children, (whether fighting or playing, it all seems to trigger me), years of trying to heal a 4 year olds constipation issues, trying to start my own business, which fulfills me and is my passion, but having to put it to the side each time another sickness (and there have been too many to count this fall) or change in sitter schedule pops up, financial stress and credit card debt, and day to day responsibilities. I can't stop but I want to. So I'll just keep trucking and know that things look better in the mornings. I will try to take your advice and hold capacity for what is important and lose the things that drain me. Happy holidays and cheers to a fresh new year!
Courtney, I really like that you clarified that this is one of the hardest seasons of life, but not THE hardest. I think I've also had some periods that were on a very personal level much harder (single mom w/ infant on welfare, for instance), but I think that "stuck in the tunnel" thing you referenced is a universal, or almost universal, feeling right now. I know, like Kim said above, that there have been other points like this in history & people somehow made it to the other side or through the tunnel, but this is a pretty dramatically low point that we're all experiencing vs. our personal lowest points.
I'm so sorry to hear all those things weighing on you & esp. want to acknowledge the "want to stop, but can't" aspect of it. I sending you even the tiniest extra capacity for joy.
Looking forward to hearing from you after your long restful break. We all need that. Thanks for all the inspiration and wise words in 2022. You always nail it. Love and light x
Thanks so much for the encouragement, Abi. Lots of joy & rest to you too!
We are definitely on one accord here. I was interviewed last week and they asked what my plans were for the rest of the year. Without skipping a beat, I replied, "To end softly. I have been going strong for the last few years and it is time to go soft. I will start strong again in January."
Everything in nature rests. We are no different. Rest without fear dear friend. Fear is work so rest without it. I will be here when you get back, as I am sure others will be too.
You just made me tear up. Thanks for the reassurance. And yes, we aren't a part of nature, we ARE nature. Rest matters for us too. I hope you have the deepest rest over the holiday too. Hugs.
This resonated big time. Add in the loss of my mother the day after Christmas 2021 and then 7 days later on Jan 2, Covid took my father. It’s been a really rough few years. I need a break too. Im going to join you, and hopefully come back feeling a little better. ❤️
Oh, Amanda, I am so very sorry to read that. That is an incredibly painful loss so close together. I'm so glad you're going to join me in taking a break & I hope it helps refill your tank, even just the smallest bit.
Thank you, it was quite a shock. I’ve avoided social media breaks because, well, then I’d have to face the facts. Your message spoke to me and I feel the time is right. Grateful for you, and this neighborhood. 😘
Resonate? More like howls, or wails.
It's been more three years since I've slept through the night. I'm trying to find my way back, hacking and trudging through dense underbrush back to peace, rest, hope. Back to myself.
May you, and all of us, enjoy peace on your break, Angie. We'll be here when you get back: we're all too exhausted to go anywhere in just a few weeks!
Back to myself. I get it, Jen! Thanks for sharing the very honest howls & wails.
Enjoy the break.
Thank you, Ruthie!
That quote from Sara Ahmed really sits with me. I feel that on so many different levels. Thank you for putting this into words. And for acknowledging the railway workers! I'll see you in 2023, friend.
Yes, Melanie, I haven't stopped thinking about it since I saw it this summer. And you're welcome on the railway workers . . . I have a lot of respect for that type of work. I used to work in trucking and import/export. I helped coordinate a lot of freight moving from our ports on to trains. They work non-stop & deserve all they demand & then some.